This quote always comes to mind when I think about many of my good friends and politics since 2016. For years, especially during my time in the North Georgia mountains, I hung out with people who became good friends; we visited and helped one another, shared dinners and cocktails and in time, formed a “neighborhood” of about 10 to 15 regulars who got together frequently. For the most part, we never discussed politics. Socially we had all been cut from the same bolt of cloth.
Therein is the story. Two events stand out. The first was a Christmas party hosted by good friends, I attended alone as my wife was out of town, Early in the evening the hostess identified me as the writer of a letter to the editor of the local paper which was highly critical of Trump as a presidential candidate in 2016. It went downhill from there. A silence fell over the room and soon turned to ill-concealed murmurs of contempt. One guest even told me that I couldn’t sit at the dinner table because it was only for Republicans; he was not joking, I assure you. My evening ended when I took French leave out a side door.
The other event marked Trump’s first election in 2016. Somehow my wife and I got on the guest list for an election party held at a local tavern. When we showed up, things turned awkward fast; some friends appeared rather sheepish though a few told us that they were happy we came. It soon became apparent that criticism of Trump was simply not acceptable and immediately branded one as a card-carrying Democrat which was not true in our case. I had voted for the Libertarian candidate, not Hillary Clinton. My vote against Trump was simply a rejection of his virtue and incompetence as a presidential candidate, period. I did not see how any reasonable, decent person could vote for him and during the campaign I had hoped that the Republicans would nominate John Kasich, the former governor of Ohio. I would have voted for him.
What baffles me is that those whom I embraced as friends could vote for Trump and continue to support him through one or two more elections. Somehow I had misread our friendship thinking that we all shared the same definition of right and wrong, decency and morality, and honesty derived from our similar backgrounds and life experiences.
What puzzles me more is that almost ten years later, most of my Trump-supporting friends have continued to support him. Most have voted for him three times. By now in Trump’s second presidency, we all know what kind of man Trump is, and we have countless examples of his actions as president.
My friends are not evil; they are nice and decent people. They favor free trade, small government, constitutional government, democracy and individual rights. They value family, religious freedom, neighborliness and are charitable in their relationships with strangers as well as friends. They do not believe in an obtrusive federal government and its ability to make social changes; they believe the government’s role should be restricted to police protection, securing our borders and ensuring our political freedom only. Politically they are registered Republicans, conservatives, libertarians or like-minded fellow travelers. Their values, for the most part, are defensible and not radical
Over the past several years I have made an effort to ask these friends if they have any buyer’s remorse having supported Trump. Almost to a person, with varying degrees of irritation, they answer in the negative. If conciliatory, they rationalize supporting Trump’s actions by pointing to some nasty or indefensible act by Democrats. Apparently one crime deserves another.
Is it that they simply can’t bring themselves to say that they were wrong in staking their hopes on Trump? Reading the list of their political views should reveal that Trump and his MAGA supporters have repeatedly violated or threatened virtually all of my friends’ social and political values. Trump is not a conservative but a rogue player preoccupied with his own power and well- being.
Part of the answer for their initial support and continued intransigence, I’m afraid, is their absolute contempt for Democrats.
For that I am sorry, for I have never harbored hatred for Republicans.
*Quote attributed to President Warren Harding commenting on the troubles his friends caused him while in the White House.